[Quark]

Fear and Loathing on Bill Peak Hope ole rubberlegs doesn’t see this afore I get a chance to ‘splain….but due to Stuff & Things, JP and I jumped the gun n’ did Bill Peak today. Don’ worry, rubb, there’s plenty left for youse! Bill Peak is the approx 6700-ish' peak west of Bean/Volcanic Neck and east of Iron. We had Grande Plannes of doing Gene and Iron Peaks as well; and it would have worked, too, except the snow really was more than us 2 gals could kick-step in one day, expeshially since I’m not very strong, being a nubile blonde college stoodint & all & haven't been out much this year (yet). Plus, I got all spacey at home this morning and grabbed my city-slicker sunglasses rather than my glacier glasses, and the intended peaks are still under snow, and my eyes get a headache in brilliantly sunshined snow. Just doing Bill (Peak, that is) sorta burned my retinas, so the other peaks were nixed even if I coulda kick-stepped all the way to Truth or Consequences, New Mexico (which I might be able to do, I never tried). As it was, we sorta lucked out & tagged along behint some Mountaineers stoodints who all kick-stepped up Bill for us, pro’bly ‘bout 1,000’ or so. But it was still hard, you know! It still takes brains and talent and guts and buns of steel! The snow was not scary at all. But just in case of trouble, I deployed my ice axe before we even got out of the car. I think I unsheathed it at the gas station in Cle Elum (this statement is NOT directed at Larry). I didn’t want no trouble with no snow. Once on the trail, we caught our first glimpse of snow - a 1x1” patch of the stuff lurking behind a ponderosa about ¼ mile from the trailhead. I admit I got a little worried for awhile; especially since it was quite obvious it was trying to hide from us. I swear I think I may have heard it snarl. But we distracted it by tossing a rock behind it, and we slipped by, no problem. Snow ain't as smart as people think it is. Bean Creek is runnin’ a bit high. It ain’t a killer creek if you fall in, but it may be a little inconvenient for those wusses out there who don’t like to get their precious tootsies wet. JP bashed around for a good crossing, while I mulled it over for a moment. I thought to myself, “now, what would Backpacker Girl do in a situation like this?” So after whipping out my journal and writing about it, I just waded across, fiercely and proudly as I am wont to do in any situation involving High Creeks (ok, so forget the Kennedy Creek incident). Wet feet don’t bother me a bit, and I can (and have) hiked for days and days in wet boots. Well, I haven't hiked for days in wet boots, that's goofy. I mean I have hiked for days while wearing wet boots. Anyway, the crossing found by JP didn’t seem worth it to me, as it took like forever and she got wet anyway. I always learn new cusswords when I’m out wi’ Janet. Janet's my hero! The Teanaway trails are in full avalanche lilly heaven, as well as lewisia. Lupine is blooming along the road. It’s already hot there. Chances are, this was my last trip to the area 'til fall. I don’t fare well in hot weather. I’m quite sure I’ll melt. The snow on the trail is in patches, 'til about 5800 where it's about 50%, and there are some voids, but nothing that’ll kill you, but don’t ever quote me on that, espeshally on your tombstone. Just use your noodle (this statement is NOT directed at Larry) and you’ll be okay. The snow finger thingy we used to summit is steep, but unless you’re there in a hard freeze, it’s easy to kick steps into. Ice axe recommended, though. Views of Mt. Stuart, and Peaks Bean, Mary, Judy and the Volcanic Neck were nifty as one would expect them to be on brilliantly sunny day, brilliant enough to give your eyes a headache. Summit register included famous names such as John Tolan, Randy Busch, now me, of course, but NO rubberlegs and NO Mike Torok. We figure Mike was probably born on it, or something, or did it so long ago the register with his name in it is preserved in the Smithtorokian Institution.

[Allison]

Quark, you are one SEXY BEAST! Couple of things though....one is that eveyone knows "Backpacker Girl" is me, it's okay, darling....and also are you SURE a woman in her 40s can be, er, "nubile"? I'm okay with it if you are though. Now let's see a TR from Mount Si or Snow Lake, none of this esoteric shiz the MEN like to do!!

[Larry]

You know...these references to ice axe unsheathings and similar backhanded statements from Quirk don't bother me one bit. I am completely secure in my manhood, and consider myself more or less an icon of the American Dream. And frankly, I think that Allison can attest to that from her brief meeting with me when I so thoroughly tested a Deuter pack with approximately 70 pounds of load. Never mind that, even to this day, I won't shower in a Men's locker room, and when I am at a public restroom I tend to scrunch in pretty close to the porcelain. But, again...that has nothing to do with any perceived lack of "making the grade". It is more related to maintaining my persona and stature among all men (and women). So...that's fine...make statements about "noodles", and then go ahead and mention my name. I'm above all that. In fact, I'm pretty much above it all, don't you think, Quirk? And, the kicker in all this is that I'm not all that bad for a "man in his 50s". I proved it this morning when I was smiling at myself for 20 minutes or so while looking in the mirror. (Side note: Don't use your electric toothbrush for more than 15 minutes, while looking in the mirror. The toothpaste turns into a foam that drips down and stains your shirt, and is unsightly).

[An Observer]

Ouark or Quirk, aren't you trying to be a bit too cute?

[kleet]